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< > December 2001

• Wed, Dec 26, 2001 11:37 PM

  24 weeks. B.C.
  
  I think it’s time you knew something. I’m scared. I’m scared of you and how you’re going to affect our lives. I’m so utterly concerned that I won’t be up to it, up to your needs and the pressures of providing for you, Chona and myself. Scared that I won’t be the center of Chona’s world anymore, and concerned that you and I won’t click.
  
  I’m not panicked, though it may sound that way. I’m so excited to see Chona expanding and read all about your latest development, and I’m thrilled at your entry into our lives.
  
  By the way, you are now 5 inches long and we’re told you may start moving around soon. Mom’s belly is becoming unmistakably round – literally, it’s like she just popped in the last few days. You’re on your way, that’s for sure.
  

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• Thu, Dec 20, 2001 11:37 PM

  25 weeks B.C.
  
  Name shopping tonight. Here’s what I’ve got so far:
  
  Bela, Mia, Jeremiah, Ada, Aruba, Kemi (river), Neva (river), Jebel (mtn). You like any of them?
  
  

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• Mon, Dec 17, 2001 11:36 PM

  25 weeks B.C.
  
  You’re coming out! Well, I think you are. Chonie’s starting to get a bit pudgy, but this pudge is a bit harder and lower down than typical pudge might be. And you gotta see her nipples. Actually, I’m sure you will.
  
  I could use some advice from you. See, I’m starting to think about what’s coming next. In life, I mean. Beyond the next few months, but not so far as to paralyze me. What will ignite a fire? What will keep me up at night, dreaming? Well, you for one…but what else? I saw a film tonight about teaching and I got all misty-eyed…is that next? Teach what? To whom? Man, I wish you could talk.
  
  I’m a daydreamer, and a worrier all in one. I’m yinging when I want to yang. I can turn good into bad with ferocious speed. I want the one I cannot have.
  
  To dreams of fresh-cut grass, and days of hot sun and cool wind, big oak leaves falling around us. To backyards and barbeques, to placemats and Frisbees, to finding pennies on the pool floor. To soccer games and spaghetti and messy ice cream cones. And none of that L.A. yogurt stuff.
  
  Hey, here’s something we should talk about: your name. See, we’re calling you “Blobby” right now. Please know that we say this with affection and love. We most likely won’t stick with it when you emerge into daylight, but it’s kinda catchy, and quite easy to rhyme with. Think about it, will ya?
  
  Tomorrow’s our anniversary, by the way. Gotta get Mom something… 6 years and 7 months. Sheesh! She’s gotten pretty beautiful lately. And that I mean. Normally, I don’t believe that pregnancy “beauty” crap…it’s hard to go through, you feel like hell, and, well, you don’t look so great. But your Mom is just getting so darn stunning! She’s got an air of I don’t know what…fertitlity, womanhood…it’s a more mature vibe than before, yet she still looks like she’s 12. It all just comes together. And don’t think I don’t notice those big boobs…remind me to thank you for that some day.
  

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• Thu, Dec 13, 2001 11:35 PM

  26 weeks B.C.
  
  Drama at the house over the last 24 hours. Our new house, your first home, was broken into while we were out. We discovered the break-in when we headed upstairs after spending a couple of hours with Chona’s parents. There’s something about seeing your closet all disturbed that threw me for a loop…it’s cliché, but you really do feel violated. The police came, Mom and Sy came over, and within hours, all was repaired, well, except our nerves. We’ll be teaching you how to lock doors, don’t you worry.
  

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• Wed, Dec 12, 2001 11:34 PM

  26 weeks B.C.
  
  A few days ago, we heard your heartbeat. Whoosh-whoosh-whoosh. Somehow, I was expecting it to sound like that. It’s especially odd to hear your heart when we don’t see any evidence of you in Chona’s belly yet…though she’s definitely getting some pudge!
  

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